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I’m Gonna Live ‘Til I Die

I’m Gonna Live ‘Til I Die

Sarah Vaughan

 

Dear Dee,

I dedicate this song to you and hope you use it as your life song, your theme song, alarm clock and pick me up, because you no choice, but to live until you die, so why not enjoy everything in the middle. Nola Chic

Tonight I realized I have to live up until the very moment of lifelessness leaves my body. We say that some things in life are predestined to happen to us, some say it’s God’s will for us, we were chosen, we aren’t given too much we can’t bear and so on. In my 40+ years I have had my share of love and heartache, had my share of happy and sad tears, dived in passion and pain, witness life come and leave, but what I realize tonight while I go through the good and bad I am gonna make for certain that I enjoy those in my life.

I often think, why is this, this way, why this person doesn’t change, when is enough, enough??  There has to be a point of if not acceptance of the other person or circumstance changes, why not make a change in it yourself, live it out to achieve your happiness. I felt myself tonight, wondering why has this situation not changed and I decided it would be me, because I want my happiness, I want to live happily within it until I die. I actually have no choice or see it any other way.

There are times I look at people and wonder how did it come to be that they are in my life and I in there’s, our lives intertwined to live our lives knowing each other in some form. There are days when we can not be one loved one, not even hearing their voice over the phone, but they are still apart of our lives. The tall, dark and handsome who swept you off your feet, is now the man you hate and there is no unknowing of anyone. Now, with social media your very life is filled with the knowing of others lives who you only know in the virtual world, but their very being, soul matters to yours.

Yes, that has o be it living til you die even if it’s good or bad, so why not live through the bad to show the good that you possess.. That’s it I’m gonna live until I die to thank God for all of it, hoping life’s lessons brought me closer to my purpose.

 

 

 

I’m gonna live till I die
I’m gonna laugh ‘stead of cry
I’m gonna take the town and turn it upside down
I’m gonna live, live, live till I die

They’re gonna say “What a guy!”
I’m gonna play for the sky
Ain’t gonna miss a thing I’m gonna have my fling
I’m gonna live, live, live till I die

The blues ‘ll lay low I’ll make ’em stay low
They’ll never trail over my head
I’ll be a devil till I’m an angel
But until then, Halelujah! Gonna dance, gonna fly
I’ll take a chance ridin’ high
Before my number’s up I’m gonna fill my cup
I’m gonna live, live, live, live, live until I die

I’m gonna live till I die
I’m gonna laugh ‘stead of cry
I’m gonna take the town and turn it upside down
I’m gonna live, live, live till I die

They’re gonna say “What a guy!”
I’m gonna play for the sky
Ain’t gonna miss a thing I’m gonna have my fling
I’m gonna live, live, live till I die

 

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Native of New Orleans, who endured 20yrs cruel Minnesota Cold, I decided at 42yrs old it was time to pack up my then 6yr old and come back to my roots. I am all things that would challenge the belief of growing up in New Orleans. I was a 16yr old teen mother of a preterm 2lb baby girl born with a disability. With the help of my mother who had her own struggles. We survived the obstacles laid before us. I'm the proud mother of three children with two failed adoptions, as well as a grandmother of three, two grandsons and a granddaughter. I survived two abusive marriages. I successfully ran a soulfood restaurant and catering company in Minnesota for 12 years. I started creating custom cakes after the murder of my beloved cousin Melvin Paul.  He survived Katrina only to go to Minneapolis six months later to be murdered over a parking spot dispute.  I put my all into my cake business over the years as House of Cakes was started right out of my house in honor of him. I thought by having the big house on the hill, a husband, having a family, foster/adoptive mother at that, being involved in all things that matter, plus having the funds to match would cure me in a sense; but most of it poisoned my heart and soul. I had a broken heart and I felt deep down the only way to repair it was to get back to my roots, my soul, my home,  myself, my New Orleans. I'm here and I'm loving it. Even being in the so called Blighted Area of New Orleans and not having all the financial and material security, I'm happy. I am determined that She, yes New Orleans is a woman is just like me; together we will overcome and will rise from all that tried to kill our spirit. Nothing like starting from the bottom and making your way back up! I'm down in the boot, but I know I have a nice floppy hat awaiting my destiny...

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